All About Perfect

So, in day 2 of getting caught up on my blog, I thought I'd tell you all a little more about my latest release, Perfect.

​​This is a story near and dear to my heart, because it's a departure from the horror/sci-fi stories I've been writing up until now, and it also helped me come to terms with some major changes in my life while I was writing it.

Perfect chronicles the tale of a sentient android named Michael who is sold as a house slave, but learns how to love himself, and those who are also different than himself. Writing this story was the way I processed my feelings about being nonbinary transgender, and my subsequent coming out process.

I'd felt like a boy trapped in a girl's body since I was very little - but this was a body I didn't necessarily want to have surgery on, just feel and dress in a way that was natural for me. Hence, why I describe myself as nonbinary.

Because of my family background, I wasn't able to be open about my true gender identity for pretty much my whole life, and this led me to marry a cisgendered straight man, and try very hard to be a woman - even though this role didn't feel like me. I felt trapped in the female roles assigned to me, and writing this story was how I began to process my emotions related to the gender role I knew didn't fit me.

Michael is designed male, but put into traditionally female roles such as house cleaner, cook, and sexual partner by his female owner. I wrote the role to specifically describe how I felt being male in a female body, as a way to somehow describe how it felt for me. I also wanted to make a commentary on societal gender roles, and how they force us into behaviors that might not represent who we actually are.

Having Michael be white, and his owner black was also my way of describing how the institution of slavery is and was not okay, and how people of African and Aboriginal descent should never have been forced into slavery for the color of their skin. I hoped that by portraying the shocking image of a blonde-haired white man being owned by a black woman, this would open eyes and help white people empathize with the African and Aboriginal experience, by putting themselves in the shoes of enslaved African and Aboriginal people.

Yes, I am white, but it was my way of empathizing with the people of African and Aboriginal descent whom I admire so much.

Through the course of writing this novel, I decided to come out as transgender, and that unfortunately ended my marriage as well. It has been a long and painful road through this process, but I stand here today feeling like I'm finally being honest with both myself and the people I love for the first time, ever.

I love this story because it describes how a person like me can still love others, even if those people are different than themselves, and it also discusses what it feels like to find one's personhood and freedom.

Yeah, it's a pretty big metaphor story, but it's helped me make a major transition in my life, and to follow my truth with grace.

I still love writing horror novels, and will continue to write both horror and sci-fi stuff, but there are some stories like Perfect and my December release, Here, which are purposefully written with no gore or violence. Both Perfect and Here are tales that have helped me grow as a person as I've written them, and I'm happy to share them with you, my readers.

Thanks for catching up with me, and happy reading!

Cheers,

Steph